Tuesday 14 July 2015

Relationship guidelines worth remembering.


If there's one issue that everyone will be faced with at one point in time, it is that of relationships. Because every person has an innate desire to belong, to relate with the opposite sex and to experience love, relationships are part of the human experience. If you look to the creation story in Genesis 2, you'd see that Adam was lonely in the garden, even though he was technically not alone (as there were other animals on earth). Adam didn't have someone of his kind (human) and type (compatible) to relate with. We can therefore see that the need for relationship with the opposite sex was in man from the beginning. Of course, most adults who enter into relationships desire for such to end in marriage, which according to the scriptures, is still in line with God's purpose. When God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone, He created Eve and she became his wife “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him” Genesis 2:18 [NKJV]. Eve was therefore meant to be a life-time companion to Adam. This is actually God’s idea of marriage…it’s about companionship.

 A husband and wife are supposed to be each other’s best friend. They lovingly (not forcefully or grudgingly) should be able to live as one with each other, and be well able to handle each other’s weaknesses. This is evidently what God intended by forming Eve out of Adam; she had ‘the stuff’ which was needed to live compatibly with him. Adam himself got this revelation when he said of Eve, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man,” Genesis 2:23 [NKJV]. A husband and wife are like two sides of the same coin.

Based on this premise, singles need to understand that not every relationship is meant to end in marriage. It would be safe to say that some relationships are just meant for the moment, or to put it more aptly, for a season. There are people God brings into your life for a specific purpose, and when this purpose has been fulfilled, He removes them. In such cases, it would be unwise to try and keep the relationship going. As a Christian, you must always believe that God knows what is best for you. So if He removes someone from your life, don’t try to keep him/her. People need to know that friendship must be the foundation of every relationship that is headed down the marriage path. If you’re in a relationship that is devoid of genuine friendship, I wouldn’t think it wise to consider getting married.



Just because you like a person, doesn't mean you need a relationship with him/her. There are people that will not add any value to your life, but rather subtract from it.

 Many relationships are simply time-wasters while some people will only help destroy your destiny or distract you from it.

Furthermore, avoid being involved with someone who makes you compromise your faith, values and ideals. Even the Bible tells us that “evil company corrupts good habits” 1 Corinthians 15:33. We must also remember that the Bible warns believers not to be “unequally yoked with unbelievers.” This is very applicable in deciding about relationships also.

The worst mistake we can make is to constantly get mixed up with people who make us conform to their own image or ideas of who we should be. Never lose yourself and/or your identity because you want a man/woman to love you. Learn to guard your heart from unnecessary heartbreak and hurt.

If you desire marriage, then believe that just like God tailor-made Eve for Adam, so has He created a spouse for you. There is someone that is your perfect match, one who compliments you in every sense of the word...someone with whom you CAN build a lifelong love-filled relationship. By faith, you can ask God to bring this person into your life. And when you find the one God made for you, you'll be accepted for who you are...even your weaknesses won't be an issue. 

 Always remember that you have the Holy Spirit and the word of God to guide and counsel you in every aspect of your life, even as regards relationships.